Everybody hates me because I'm so universally liked.
Your manuscript is both good and original, but the part that is good is not original and the part that is original is not good. (attributed)
The length of a film should be directly related to the endurance of the human bladder.
As an adolescent I aspired to lasting fame, I craved factual certainty, and I thirsted for a meaningful vision of human life - so I became a scientist. This is like becoming an archbishop so you can meet girls.
If all the world's a stage, I want to operate the trap door.
1. Never tell everything at once. (Ken Venturi's Two Great Rules of Life)
There's so much pollution in the air now that if it weren't for our lungs there'd be no place to put it all.
If all economists were laid end to end, they would not reach a conclusion.
Sometimes I think the surest sign that intelligent life exists elsewhere in the universe is that none of it has tried to contact us.
The best ideas come as jokes. Make your thinking as funny as possible.
It is now proved beyond doubt that smoking is one of the leading causes of statistics.
There's a fine a line between support and stalking and let's all stay on the right side of that.